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Travelling can be a wonderful experience — if you’re
in the right company. Many people have gone on holiday with
their families, friends, colleagues and acquaintances without
experiencing a single difficulty. Many other have returned
stress, irritable, and complaining madly about their companions.
Some lifelong friends, and even beloved spouses, have turned
into spiteful enemies after they went on holiday together
for the first time. Its not likely to happen to you, but
just in case, here are a few things to consider before you
decide to go on a holiday with your good, old friend of
a dozen years.
Are you an independent traveller, or a dependent one?
Do you want to do absolutely everything together or are
you ok with going off sightseeing on your own when your
partner want to go back to the hotel for a nap? Sometimes,
the conflict between travelling companions is due to one
person’s need for company — they don’t want, or don’t know
how to be alone. Choose a travelling companion who suits
you. If you’d rather see some sights yourself, make sure
your companion is going to be comfortable with the situation.
Neither of you should feel pressured to see what only the
other person wants to see, or panicked at being left alone.
Sometimes, a clash of personalities is to blamed. The
most common companionship problem is one person’s short
temper, and quite a few vacations have been spoiled by one
red faced outburst. If you’re not a particularly patient
person, it’s a good idea to find a companion who is. This
way, at least one person will remain calm and reasonable
while the other is ranting and raving. If it is not possible
to find such a patient person, you can always agree to take
turns at losing your tempers, or limit each person to one
outburst a day. Silly as it sounds, this technique works!
If you’re not a particularly patient person, it’s also
not a good idea to travel with someone who’s not too bright.
He’s liable to think his questions/behaviour are perfectly
clear, reasonable and intelligent, and won’t understand
why you’re always snapping at him.
The hours you normally keep will also have an impact
on your relationship. If you are a night person, do not
travel with a morning person. You’ll be grouchy in the morning,
he’ll be sleepy at 10 in the evening. This does not bode
well for stress-free holiday communication.
Lax timekeeping is also a sore point among many vacationers
turned enemies. If you think a 10 ‘o’ clock appointment
means you can show up at 10:45, its not a good idea to travel
with someone who wants to be there by 9:59:59. Though many
consider this a mild form of holiday irritation, its surprising
how much a mismatch of timekeeping skills can damage an
otherwise promising holiday.
The possible topic of contention most people are concerned
with is: money. It can get in the way of the strongest friendships,
so make sure your budgets match and you agree on who pays
for what. As far as possible, verify the costs you both
will be paying. Unexpected costs can test your budget, your
temper and ultimately, your friendship.
One consideration not often thought of is the speed at
which you move. Some people crawl along at snail’s pace,
others zoom ahead like hares. Do you and your partner share
a similar pace? It’s easier and less stressful travelling
when you both move at the same rate, so that one doesn’t
always have to wait for the other to catch up.
If you’re going to share a room and one (or both) of
you snore or talk in your sleep, make sure you’re both comfortable
with the situation. If you’re backpacking, you’re more likely
to find yourselves sharing a bed, so if one (or both) of
you habitually roll around in bed, steal the covers or fidget
all night, make sure you’re both comfortable with the situation.
If you’re sharing a bathroom, you may need to set time limits
on how long each of you are in the bathroom. If you (or
your partner) take half an hour to bath, you may want to
wake up half an hour earlier to bath first. In places where
the hot water supply is uncertain, this issue can become
quite a sore point, so agree on a time limit before taking
that first loooong shower.
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